please do not mind that i've never take it seriously

having insomnia for more than a month,
during SPM,
I'm distracted,
i'm so stressed,
not for exam, but us.

we met at the wrong time,
which was the time i felt that,
it's time for me to study without doing anything else.
i thought that i can handle both side,
but i don't,
completely no.
i was so selfish just for my future,
i shouldn't made the promise that i couldn't fulfill,
i admit,
i have never thought of you.

i should have tell you this earlier.
you have told me i'm just a little boy,
i do agreed with it.

i'm just so agreed with what your friend told you earlier,
we are completely from a different world.

it wasn't i have no BALLS to face you,
the only thing i can tell you is,
i really can't find the other right time to settle off this thing,
i'm leaving soon,
very very soon,
for years.
i know this is a bad excuse,
yet it is the truth.

there is no correct or wrong,
just the way of thinking is different,
background was different.

i'm no good in putting my feeling into precise words,
but hope through this few sentences,
can make your mind clear that,
i'm just not ready at all.